What Does Designing Your Life Look Like?

When you have a coaching business called Life by Design, having a perception of clarity for one's life is essential. I needed to walk the talk.

That journey began four and a half years ago.

I asked myself: Chrissy, what do you want your life to look like? The answer was clear—rooted in the values I resonated with most: freedom, fun, integrity, care, and authenticity. These became my foundation guiding principles, the touchstones I return to when making decisions—especially the ones that shape and transform my life.

Being single made this process easier, of course. But being in a partnership presents its opportunities—to define boundaries, to navigate shared visions, and to ask vital questions:

●       Is my partner emotionally available and supportive?

●       Are we committed to the same vision for our relationship?

These questions naturally arise when designing a life you love—if you’ve even allowed yourself to dream.

When both partners are aligned, it’s a strong foundation. Surprisingly, one of the healthiest things you can do for your relationship is prioritise your needs first.

Yes, that’s exactly what I said—your desires and needs come before your partner’s or your children’s.

For many women, this idea is deeply confronting. Children come first—it’s an ingrained belief. Putting them third on the need to attend to list often triggers guilt. It feels selfish. But as Catriona Lightfoot explores in her blog, it’s a shift in perspective worth considering.

If you don’t take care of yourself first, you’ll have nothing left to give. Running on empty leads to exhaustion, burnout, and, ultimately, illness. Prioritising your well-being isn’t selfish—it’s self-full. When you nourish yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally, you show up as a better partner, parent, and person.

This isn’t about neglect—it’s about reassessing beliefs and asking whether they truly support the life you want to live.

Answering the Big Question

So, how did I answer What do you want your life to look like, Chrissy? And just as importantly—How will it feel to live that life?

Knowing, after years of self-employment, that working for someone else wasn’t for me. That part was easy.

Self-employment was a given—it always had been. But how would I earn a living? That’s where my values came in again—freedom, fun, integrity, care, and authenticity.

I had always equated freedom with travel, with going wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted. But as I dug deeper, I realised my definition of freedom was self-determination. It meant never needing permission to make choices for myself. It meant tuning into my inner knowing, trusting the process, and ensuring my decisions aligned with my life vision.

My decision-making process became simple:

1. Consider the options.

2. Connect with my inner knowing.

3. Trust my intuition—my body's response.

4. Ask: Does this align with my vision?

   
   

When I followed this process, decisions became effortless.

Designing My Life: The Essentials

A few things became non-negotiable:

●       Helping others and making a difference – Something I had always done, reflected even in my Soul Purpose through numerology.

●       The ability to work remotely and travel – Years of listening to my salon clients’ travel stories had ignited a longing: One day, that will be me.

●       Self-employment – Not a new concept, but this time, I wanted to create something that combined my experience, talents, and passions without reinventing the wheel.

●       A business model that allowed freedom – Work had to fit around my life, not vice versa..

The Turning Point

How did it all come together?

Selling my salon after 22 years was, in the end, an easy decision. I had loved helping clients look and feel their best, but I was over hairdressing as my primary means of self-expression. It was time for a change.

Enrolling in a Breakthrough Life Coaching course felt like a natural progression—another way to support people, just in a different capacity.

And then, something extraordinary happened.

Living in a rural community, I gave a woman a haircut on her deck—thanks to a casual Facebook request. When I’d finished, I shared my usual tips on styling and maintenance. She turned to me, eyes wide, and said, “Why has no one ever told me this before?”

At that moment, I felt something shift. My heart expanded—an unfamiliar but undeniable sensation. It wasn’t until later that I fully grasped the significance. I had unintentionally merged my two greatest passions—people and hairdressing—with my newfound coaching skills, something I’d done previously, this time though is was as if I needed to notice it!

That was the spark. The beginning of something new. The moment Your Hair Coach Method was born.